HisPeaceisFree

How Beautiful Heaven Must Be

2010-07-25T13:01:00.000-07:00

"We read of a place that's called heaven, it's made for the pure and the free. These truths in God's word He hath given, how beautiful heaven must be...."

I so look forward to church on Sunday morning. For reasons that aren't clear to me yet, God has steared me back to the baptist church I grew up in. As I went this morning, my butt it was a draggin'. Satan tried so many different things on me to get me to stay home, BUT....I knew God needed me in services this morning. I knew He wanted me there and I went.

Had I been sitting on an "aisle" seat, I'd probably got up and left. The special music being sung this morning was the song with the above title. Immediately, without a thot, tears flowed from my eyes and there I sat, nearly 59 years old, bawling like a baby while this duet of women sang the song in the most magnificent of harmony and sound. I was so overcome I grabbed my brother's hand in every effort to compose myself and not make a spectacle of me. The song was shared for EVERYONE in the service.....not just for me. I listened to every word and clung to every word between the tears. I cannot recall a time in my life when I was more thankful for my brother than those moments. He never flinched. He never wavered. He never put his arm around me and hugged, he simply stood strong in my storm and held my hand....well....Jesus held my hand thru my brother. As I managed to settle, my thoughts went to my face. What a mess I probably was and of course, not a kleenex in sight. So often I make sure a couple are folded in my Bible, but of course, not this time. I could only imagine the sight I was! Inside I had to laugh because I knew God understood and it didn't matter one bit to Him.

You see, countless times Mom and I sang that old hymn the days before her homegoing. She'd start singing and I'd join in. My how Mom longed for heaven! My how I wanted her to have the best! I knew heaven was the best and I longed for her to stay, yet, I longed for her to go.

I miss her so much and you know what? It's okay! I figure folks would be disappointed with me, (with us), if we didn't miss her. After the benediction I told Brother to tell those dear ladies what a wonderful job they did but they were NOT allowed to sing that song in services again unless I am warned! LOL!!!!! He never flinched. He never wavered! It's as if my "storm in the service" had not happened. You see, that's God! That's God working thru my brother, flowing HIS PEACE, HIS LOVE, for ME!

How beautiful heaven must be!!!!!

2010-07-17T06:19:00.000-07:00

"God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalm 73:26

Testing, Testing, Testing......Here I am again. To some it is a welcome sight....to others I am strange, and to some a complete stranger. I am praying I can share on this blog far more often than I ever have before. I suppose the first thing to do is to "catch up" so people will better understand me, if understanding me is possible at all.

Do we love this weather or what? Or what is what I say! I have no desire to shovel snow or have it shoveled for me BUT....this humidity can go away any time now. Our youngest son moved to Texas in the spring and I am always blaming him for this heat/humidity! I think he's sending it to us! lol!!

I am still performing on the stage of life where God has placed. Yep...still working retail only the stage is a whole lot bigger than I ever was on. I cannot give God enough praise for ALL the opportunities He gives me to share Him and His love day after day. Often I have hugged complete strangers because they needed a hug. Often I've been able to share just a word of encouragement to so many. It's tough 'OUT THERE" and life is wearing so many down. What a blessing to this heart to look at my workplace as a "stage" for God. I am where He needs me....at least for now.

Most of you know Mom went home to be with the Lord in December, 2008. I don't care how old a person is when they loose their mother......it's tough. It's tough for me. I miss her so much. We laughed so much all my life. We spent sooooooooo much time together. It has been a major, major adjustment for me to go on without her, and I keep trying every day. With God's help, I've made it this far. I give HIM all praise for Mom's home going! She always deserved the best and NOW, Mom has the BEST! I can't wait til it's my turn to go!

Bill keeps busy this time of year mowing the grass, fiddling in his canaries, and trying to get the garden to produce. We had a lot of rain here and it hurt our garden. I keep telling him it doesn't matter because no matter what comes from it, we will be thankful. God is good! I can't complain.

My goodness the challenges of life are many, aren't they. I can't encourage any of us enough to stay faithful to His Word. It is thru His Word we can hear Him the best. Recently a friend shared a new devotional book with me and I stand amazed at how the short devotionals from this little book speaks so clearly to me and to my life and circumstances right now....right here, right where I am in life. I love devotional that BEGIN with a Scripture verse! No better way to begin! Allow me to share a "bite" of this new little book God sent my way:

"Even in the midst of noise and clamor, there is a quiet place that I can retreat to-----a place where concerns are left behind and I am totally aware of being in the presence of God. This quiet place is nearer than the air I breathe, for it is within my soul. Turning within, I feel the peace of God surrounding me in a warm embrace. Enfolded in peace, I experience how it feels to have every nerve soothed and my mind swept clean of confusion. Once again I am focused on the presence of God---my source of life and living."

Sure wish I could write like that! Is that awesome or what! I pray it was a real blessing to you. I know it's what God wanted me to share right now, right here on this stage!

There is LOT WE NEED to share. I hope you can stop back often and enjoy! God has brought me a LONG way.......I pray together we will get thru life........trusting Him always.......and knowing that He tells us, "My peace I give...." It's free, folks! We only need to receive it!

Til next time.........keep reading a Psalm every day..........hugs to all..... Dea

Giving thanks.........

2009-11-26T13:40:00.000-08:00

I remember often encouraging others that the BEST time in my life to give thanks to God is when the challenges are many and heartaches are really hurting. I am finding it very difficult this Thanksgiving to "practice" what I preach.

Didn't know it was going to hurt so much to get thru Thanksgiving without my Mom. I miss her so much. I find a deep heartache within that hasn't even begun to heal.

"Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! His mercy ENDURES forever." Psalms 136:1

I have had the opportunity lately to "encourage" a very discouraged friend. Everytime I'd email her I'd say, "I encourage you to read a Psalm every day. Even if it's one verse, just read it."

"The Lord is my light and my salvation, Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life, of whom shall I be afraid." Psalms 27:1

As I read thru an email from her the other day, tears came to my eyes as she told me how she has her Bible on the end table now reading some Psalms. She told me she had forgotten how peaceful and encouraging the Psalms are.

"I have trusted in the Lord; I shall not slip. Examine me, O Lord, and prove me, try my mind and my heart. For your lovingkindness is before my eyes, and I have walked in Your truth...So I will go about Your altar, O Lord, that I may proclaim WITH THE VOICE OF THANKSGIVING and TELL OF ALL YOUR WONDROUS WORKS." Psalms 26:1,2,3,6,7

In my workplace one day last week, a dear senior lady came thru my line. Immediately I felt God's presence with me. I knew that dear lady had a need. I just knew it. As I took care of her merchandise, she began conversation and from the chatting we ventured into the area of sorrow and hurt. She shared with me her story of burying her 42 year old daughter "shortly after Christmas" last year. I was not at all surprised that God allowed this dear lady and I some "quality" time. No customers interupted us. None came in behind her for me to take care of. I know we chatted more than 5 minutes. I shared my own story in brief, (I can be when I have to be, ya know), about the loss of my mom and how tough it is. We shared like two old friends sitting on a front porch some place. Before she left, I came from behind the counter and asked her if she minded if I hugged her before she left. I have NEVER in my lifetime been hugged in the sincere, caring, and loving way that dear lady hugged me. I felt HIS arms as we stood there in my workplace hugging each other. Does she know my name? Yes. I wear a name badge. Do I know her name? No, BUT.....God does and that's all that matters. What an amazing experience for me in my work place. God directed us to each other so the need we had were met during that day, that time, those minutes, those seconds of our lives. I believe our need was (is) so deep that God needed to come to us personally and allow this experience for both of us. I stand amazed in His presence.

"Teach me Your way, O Lord, and lead me in a smooth path...I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would SEE the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." Psalms 27:11,13

As I reflect today I am finding it easier to thank God! As I share with you the seeminly small experiences of my life these past days, my heart is encouraged and reminded to keep on keeping on. I have so many heartaches and challenges in my life. BUT...I have so many blessings and so much to be thankful for. As David wrote:

"Weeping may endure for a night, BUT JOY comes in the morning." Psalms 30:5

Have you read some Psalms today?

Til next time....................hugs to all..............

Oh, know what else? God has brought TWO more people in my life that needs the Psalms. I'm encouraging them..............will keep you posted! God has sure been busy! I am humbled that He chooses me!

Mondays!!! Not For Me!

2009-10-08T17:59:00.000-07:00

For years I've been an advocate of eliminating Mondays. UGH! They seem to always be such a challenge for me. For months now, I have been determined not to let Monday defeat me. When I am scheduled for work EARLY on Mondays, I keep telling myself that "early in" means "early out." Been a major help to me to process that thought in this brain of mine!

This past Monday turned out to be one of the most challenging Mondays I've had in a long time. One challenge after another after another happened all day long. I had to be at work at 7am. When my feet hit the floor they hit the floor with my great attitude: early in, early out! Off to work I went. I do remember I prayed, "Lord, whatever it is I need today, thank You for giving it to me." Somehow, I knew an extra prayer was going to be needed!

I barely got in the door and the news of a "call off" was given to me. Challenge number one. Instead of being on a nice, simple, easy express register, I was getting sent to the tobacco register which is the register that never shuts down. Okay, I can do that! I will conquer!

Before 9 am I was nearly in tears. First one thing, then another. Customers in a line waiting too long. Customers walking out without paying for merchandise. Short on help, tall on challenges! A long line of customers with no extra help and sure enough, someone dumped their liquid laundry soap at the finish line of my register! Have you ever tried to clean up liquid laundry soap? The service desk employee came to my rescue and told me to tend to the line and she'd handle the mess. Thank you sweet Jesus for my help! Mentally I continued to grab any piece of a Bible verse that would come to my mind. "He will never leave me nor forsake me." Ahhhhhh......that helped a lot! I knew God was right there in that place going thru every challenge WITH ME.

Early in also means early "brunch" time. Off the floor I nearly ran in desparation to sit down and regroup! On a day when I simply wanted to be "left alone" so I could regroup, I ended up with a table full of coworkers who "never get to have lunch with me" and was thrilled to be doing so. So much for the peace and quiet, BUT.....the laughter and the sharing of challenges proved to be a real uplift.

Inside I kept claiming one promise after another. A younger believer, fellow coworker, who I am priviledged to call a new found friend, seemed to be having the same kind of day. Every chance I had, I'd encourage her to "grab a promise" and "hang on." My goodness what a help that was to her and to me!!!

I was sure after brunch the day would be better! Refreshed and regrouped, back to the battlefield I went. It never got any better. I'd drop change. I'd not be able to get the bills to come out of the drawer. I couldn't get things to go in the bags right. I'm telling you if it could happen, it did! Anyone who thinks the job of a cashier is easy, go work in our shoes for a day! Everyone thought they needed to throw the heavy stuff on the black belt. This body doesn't "deal with heavy" anymore. I was constantly scanning and asking customers to put it back in their carts! Most of the time the customers I have will ask if it needs up on the belt. Not on Monday! Unless I caught them before they did it and asked them not to, on the black belt went every bag of dogfood, every case of bottled water, everything that was heavy! This body doesn't do heavy anymore. Never ceases to amaze me how thoughtless people can be, but......no time for judging or complaining. God gave me strength and helped me thru each minute.

Now, I realize that most of this makes no sense to anyone reading it. I am trying to get us all to understand that no matter the challenges in our life, God is with us. He gives us strength to get thru the "small stuff" as well as the big stuff. We are His kids! Not only are we His kids, but HE decided to pick us to be His kids! My goodness how special that makes me feel! The God of the universe, the Creator of all, decided He wanted me to be one of His kids! I must be special!

I want to share this one last thing with you. God gave me a HUGE hug about half an hour before time for me to go home. I was exhausted! I wanted to sit down and needed to sit down. On the tobacco register you are confined. No sitting down. No stopping. I so simply wanted to go home! A customer came thru with a rather large order. I began to scan her merchandise and God's arms reached out around me thru this customer, and HE hugged me while she said, "All the chocolate in the world wouldn't fix the kind of Monday I've had."

Don't tell me God wasn't aware of the challenging Monday I had!

"In the shadow of Your wings I will make my refuge, until these calamities have passed by. I will cry out to God Most High, to God who PERFORMS ALL THINGS for me." Psalms 57:1-2

Okay, so it was the small stuff.....it still mattered to HIM!

Til next time.................hugs to all.............Dea

Enjoying and remembering.....

2009-09-19T07:57:00.000-07:00

If you have not had time to get out and enjoy all this beautiful weather God has been blessing us with, then stop reading this and get out there! My goodness has God been good with the weather or what! I can't recall so many beautiful days in a row during the months of August and September. I give HIM praise!

I have to laugh as Bill struggles to kill those little white "things" that seem to continue to visit our roses. He had me check online to see what to do to get rid of them. A simple thing like hosing them with water should do the trick. Getting them off the roses and down on the ground where "nature" can take it's course is the best way......so says the internet. Evidently that didn't suit Bill! He's back to using sevin dust on them!

Aren't we the same way in our Christian walk? God tells us what to do to deal with whatever is in our lives and what do we do? What WE think is best. I was cleaning out some files recently and stumbled over something I read that Joni Eareckson Tada wrote back in 2003. I was reminded of how, as His children, we want the seaside experiences where we can sit and listen to Him preach. We enjoy the miracles of the fish and bread experiences, but what we don't like are the hard, difficult, pain staking challenges that are just plum not comfortable. Instead of enjoying the hard, difficult, pain staking challenges just like we would a fish and bread experience, we fuss and stew and lots of times just venture out on our own knowing our way is gona work!

I cannot encourage any of us enough to not do that! During the hard, difficult, pain staking challenges that we don't like and we certainly don't want to be a part of, are the BEST times to grow in Jesus! We want all the jelly on the bread stuff, we just don't want what it takes to keep the jelly on the bread, do we? On one hand we will sit and tell God we want to KNOW HIM better. On the other hand we sit and BEG Him to release us from whatever it is that has made us so uncomfortable. Come on now! WE ALL KNOW we have done this! I guess we best constantly keep in mind that we need to be careful what we ask for. God really does listen to us! Every word! All the time!

If God has TRUSTED YOU with a major crisis, if He has TRUSTED YOU with something that is not comfortable in your life...........I encourage you to rest in the situation. I'm sure if you were standing near me, you'd want to throw a book at me or at least give me a good swat! Don't blame ya one bit. Been there, felt like that. The last thing I've ever wanted to hear from someone during one of the many uncomfortable times God has trusted me with is to rest in the challenge and be honored that God has trusted me with it.

Just to be honest..............what I'm telling you is the truth! When I sit and think of all the challenges God, (you know Him, THE GOD OF THIS UNIVERSE, the ALMIGHT GOD, THE ALPHA AND OMEGA GOD, the ONE AND ONLY GOD) has trusted me with...........I STAND AMAZED! I wouldn't trust me with a basic decision that needs made let alone trust me with all that God has trusted me with!! Yet, God sees my entire picture! He wants me to be all I can be...........for HIS GOOD AND HIS GLORY!

There has not been one of these challenges in my life that God has trusted me with that I have not come away from with MORE GOD than I ever dreamed possible! I would go into a situation like any other kid would do. I'd kick, scream, and have a fit! Did that make God take the situation away? Did it help me while the challenge that was there? God allowed the situation to work according to HIS time, not mine. My fits of rebellion only caused my "lesson to be learned" come harder.

Do I do it all right now? No! I find myself still wanting to kick and scream BUT.....I remember that little word, rest! May I PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE encourage you to think of the word REST this way: R---- Really E----Enjoy S----Solitude T---- TIME.

Webster tells me that rest means a "state of ease." God has a purpose for the challenges in our lives. He trusts us with the challenges HE KNOWS we need to have the relationship with Him not only we want and need but HE WANTS AND NEEDS. It's those valley experiences with all the solitude that we will find so much MORE God than we ever dreamed we could find.

As humans, we want the easy way. As humans, we'll accept less. As humans we just want it all over with and life back to whatever normal is. Not God's way! Just not gona happen! So, we may as well REALLY ENJOY SOLITUDE TIME (rest) in God from each challenge.

I am reminded of Matthew 11:29, "Come unto me...and I will give you (REALLY ENJOYABLE SOLITUDE TIME) rest..."

It is so hard! I am so human! I make things so much harder on myself. I don't know about you but when there's a challenge before me, I have to DO something! Resting, being still, waiting............I do not like any of those words! Those are words I'd like to take out of the dictionary. I am NOT GOOD at any of the above. YET.............it's the resting, the being still, the waiting times in my life that I have found MORE GOD than I ever dreamed I'd ever be allowed or entrusted with! It is those times that have been the most amazing times of my Christian walk. Easy? No! Amazing? YES!

If God has entrusted you with a challenge you simply want to go away, I encourage you to bury yourself in His arms and rest. Keep your eyes open. Keep your heart open. You really don't want to miss out on the "valley of blessings" God has in store for you during the time of challenge.

Until next time.....................stay in His word.................hugs to all............................Dea

Been a Long Time, Huh!!!!!

2009-09-09T20:25:00.000-07:00

yes, it has been a very long time since I've been on my blog. There have been many changes in my life and it's been a time that has been very difficult for me.

Most of you who take the time to check in on my blog already know that God took Mom home finally December 14, 2008. Of course, she even made her final rest a challenge.....but that was Mom. The funeral home where her already arranged funeral was to be was busy when she died. We had to wait til the end of the week before we could have calling hours or service. I worked until the day of the calling hours. I took that day off and the day of service and then went right back to work. I had no desire to be at home and have time to "think." Mom's home going caused an enormous amount of relief to us. We wanted Mom to always have "the best" and now, finally, she does. Even tho to this day we rejoice in Mom having the best, I think it's safe to say, we all miss her so much.

It has been especially tough on my youngest brother, and on this big baby who happens to be her baby girl. The two of us were closer to Mom than the other two. It doesn't mean she loved us more, it just means she spoiled us more. Mom was always such a part of my life my entire life. Not having her has proved to be a major, major challenge for me. I still find myself asking, "what am I suppose to do with me now?"

We have seen our youngest grandson reach the age of 1. What a cutie he is. He is such a loving little guy. If he thinks he's done something to upset you or make you mad, he'll come and want to hug and kiss to make sure you aren't mad at him. How could anyone get mad at such a jester from one so little?!!!! Our oldest granddaughter, Bryanna, continues to have a heart far older than her age. She will be 12 in October.........what a joy she is. Justin survived breaking the big bone in his left leg and laying in a body cast most of last year. He's in 3rd grade this year and playing football!!! Scares this grandmother to no end, but, he is so excited. As much as my work schedule will allow me, I will be on the sidelines rooting our little blonde on. Alexis turned 10 this year and I swear she's grown a foot this summer. Off to the country fair I went in support of her and her turkey. What fun I had enjoying her in the 4H fashion show! Back the next day for the turkey show! I survived and that's enough of that. Next year? I hope it's not a turkey. Those turkey things at the county fair takes sooooooooooooooooooooooo long! Our Gage is still the same ornery, busy little guy he has always been. He will be 4 the end of October. He takes his job as "big brother" very serious and it's such fun to watch the two of them. Reminds me so much of our own two boys at that age. God has blest us with 5 great grandkids. I'm still trying to get them all together and get ONE picture taken. Hopefully I'll figure out how to post it after I get it taken.

I continue to praise the Lord always regardless of the circumstances in my life. I continue to struggle with the dark hole of depression although I have had times when it's not been so bad. I have had to accept another physical challenge in my life in the name of diabetic neuropathy. Painful thing. I do not like it. Yet.......I have it. Life goes on and I keep telling it as well as my bad hip that I refuse to listen to them and we will go on.

I dearly love my job as a cashier at Walmart in Oberlin. I work with a great group and feel very blest to have the job I have. So many have no job at all. I SEE the results of that every day. My heart breaks when customers must put back groceries they need because they can't afford to buy them. I long to have pockets full of money so I can take care of every one of them. I cannot begin to share all the opportunities I have had to "let His light shine" at my workplace. So many times a day I find a crack, a window, and sometimes a door to speak up and be heard. I have a dear brother in Christ that will stop immediately and pray with me if I need him to. He's one of my coworkers God has placed there. I get lots of hugs from other cashiers often.........when THEY need one and when I do. My organizational skills have rubbed off on others. PRAISE THE LORD! So many are now cleaning and keeping their work areas neater and cleaner. I never SAID ONE WORD! I just try to be a good example and it has rubbed off. It was such a blessing to have a job closer to where Mom was. I rejoice to this day in that. It's closer to my house and closer to my sister and brothers. I am thankful for that, far more than I can express.

We have enjoyed a harvest from our garden this year! We continue to eat tomatoes. I think there is still one cabbage which I will use for cabbage, ham and potatoes. Speaking of potatoes...my goodness how God did multiply! Bill said he'd guess he dug about 500 pounds of red potatoes. Yes, we both are diabetic, but we are careful and there's so many things we can do with potatoes. AND.....I have plenty to share with others in need. Bill has worked hard on strawberries in hopes of having plenty of them to pick and sell next year. His berry patch sure looks nice at this point. What blessing we had with blackberries. They grow in our fence row and Bill worked hard to keep the weeds down and away from them and grass cut to make easy access. I have 4 (or was it 5) quart packages in the freezer and I think I made a total of five pies.....no, we didn't eat five pies. I sent pies to Gerry's house and sent pie to my sister and I took pie to my oldest friend, Margaret, who has been battling colon cancer. Plenty of pie to share and share we did. I'll use the frozen to munch on this winter and to bake a pie at the holidays. We have been blest and I am thankful!

Our roses grew beyond words! What a major, major thing it is to me to come here after a long day at work and see the beauty of the Lord in the roses! I was able to use some of my roses as encouragement to one of my coworkers as she graduated from college at the ripe ole age of.......well........not much younger than me. A small act of kindness gained much ground for His good and His glory!!!

Reality has set in as during this past summer we lost so many of our dear old saints that served as youth leaders and teachers during my younger years. Their time is done and God has called them home. I rejoice knowing we will have eternity together. Yet, my heart aches that we no longer have their example, or their visible strength with us. We still have one dear sweet, so very special saint left and she told my brother-in-law last week she was going to start attending the Methodist church because too many old people were dying in that church! I wish you all could meet her.................what a loveable, amazing, ornery dear saint she is. Jean told me not too long ago she'd had a long talk with God and told Him in no way was He ready to have her up there yet! How tough it will be for all of us when God calls her home! Loosing so many makes ya realize just how short life really is.

My challenges have been many, yet I know I am blest in so many ways. I truly do try hard every day to see the blessings and dwell on them. Being the human that I am, I often fail. Yet, I know it is never God who moves all over the place, it is me. Standing still and knowing has never been my strongsuit. There are days when I so long for heaven, but I know I do for all the wrong reasons. I want to be where Mom is..................and I know I need to want to be where God is! I do, I really do, but I so long to go and be where Mom is. I guess that little girl inside of me will always want her mom.

I have not dug out any new Bible verse that is gona blow us away these days. Instead I dwell on the faithful, the good ones, the strong ones that we grew up and will never forget. "Remember not the former things....behold, I will do a new thing now. It will come forth." Isaiah 43. I sure wish the new thing will come soon...................I grow weary waiting for the old things to go. I truly want to be "more like Jesus" and I realize that so often I fail.

Til next time.......and I really will try to do this more often..............hugs to all.............

Dea

Praise Him.....Praise Him....Praising Him!!!!

2008-08-13T21:12:00.000-07:00

"even tho.....yet will I praise Him." Habakkuk 3:7

"Praise the Lord! Praise God in His sanctuary: Praise Him in His mighty firmament! Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him, Let everything that has breath..................PRAISE THE LORD!" Psalm 150

The past days have been some of the most trying and difficult days of my life. I have been adjusting to a new job. We had a health scare with our new little grandson. There has been a death in the family. I've had to deal with the moving out of state of a niece and great niece that I am very close to. Our family has lost several senior saints that have been friends of our family for years. I have had to accept the demolishion of my dear aunt's house.........a house I will never forget. A house full of memories and laughter. In it's place is nothing now.

During a visit with Mom last week I realized Mom has forgotten my name. She knows I belong to her. She knows I am family. But Mom no longer remembers my name. I cried from the parking lot all the way home and cried some more when I arrived home. It was the most heartbreaking thing to me.

God and I have struggled over these months about Mom. I have been blunt and honest with Him. Mom deserves her mansion. Mom deserves to go home and get out of her world of suffering and pain. I don't understand why God has not extended His mercy to Mom and taken her home. I don't understand..............yet................His will be done.

I know God remains in control. I know God sees the entire picture. Mom is suffering. We are suffering while we wait with Mom for her home going. Why? Why doesn't He take Mom home?

I was reading a devotional just this morning about suffering. It stated that often God allows us to suffer that HE may prove Himself and glorify Himself thru our suffering. God allows us to suffer for our own good. Jesus did, ya know. Jesus suffered for MY own good! Only seems right that I suffer for Him. It is God's desire for others to SEE His power and strength. MANY people are watching us............my family and I. They are watching us as we wait and love and hug and cry and wait and love and hug and cry Mom on into eternal glory. There are 15 other residents that live with Mom. There are at least 12 or more staff members. There is the boss. That makes at least 28 people that observe us every time we go to visit with Mom or make contact in any way. My closest friends are watching me. Our church family is watching us. Our unsaved brother is watching those of us who do believe. God is busy. God is at work.

It's hard. It's so hard to go and see Mom in the shape she is in mentally. I suppose it sounds rather strange, but I'm use to watching Mom battle physical challenges. We've been thru a lot of them together. But mentally..........Mom has always been the strong one. Not for just me......but for all of us. It breaks my heart to go and visit her. Sometimes we are way back in her youth. Sometimes we are in places I haven't a clue. Sometimes we sing. Sometimes we cry. Gone are the days of laughter and fun Mom and I always had no matter how hard I try to keep it there. It's gone. Those of you reading this that has walked in this valley know and understand. For the rest of you........I hope you are never asked to walk thru this valley. It's a valley far deeper and far harder on me than any other valley God has asked me to endure. To me, Mom doesn't deserve this. To God..........thru Mom He continues to glorify Himself and He continues to do His work and His will.

On my way out of work the other day I bumped into a dear, dear Sister in Christ. There are people in this world who hug and then there are people in this world who REALLY KNOW how to hug. This sister in Christ is one that really knows how to hug. What a blessing to get the hugs I received. I give HIM all praise!

We traveled to a county fair on Monday to see our granddaughter's reserve champion turkey. As we came home, I asked Bill to stop in at the grocery store in New London. I needed freezer bags and forgot to get them. As I came out of the store, there was another of my sister's in Christ. One of my prayer warriors that I can count on to pray at any hour.......at any time I contact her to pray. To say I needed a hug from her..............I give HIM all praise!

I seldom go to Ashland anymore but found it necessary this past week. While I was there, I stopped in a local grocery store that I always enjoyed shopping in when I made weekly trips to Ashland. At the grocery store I found chicken for 99 cents a pound. (meat lovers choice...unheard of these days) I found beautiful nectarines for 68 cents a pound. (absolutely unreal in this day and time) I needed those hugs. I give HIM all praise!

It is rare that my sister and I can have time together alone. Between the responsibility we have with Mom, my job, my family..........it's tough. This week we were able to escape for a few hours to go to a local flea market. We laughed. We talked. We had lunch! I needed that hug.........I give HIM all praise!

I was told at work I always have the cleanest and neatest register and register area. I thanked the one who complimented me and at the same time my heart said........thank You Jesus! That is your victory! I give Him praise.

We are asking customers to round up their purchase to the next dollar amount so that their change can be given to children's hospital in Cleveland. All I do is ask. I was told the other day that I had gathered more money than anyone and was the ONLY one putting forth any real effort. That's God! I give Him praise!

God provided for us to have the four new tires we badly needed as well as the exhaust system on the car fixed. God has provided for us so that all of our utility bills are now current. God has provided for me to do as the ant does........store for winter. I have tried really hard to be wise with what God sends our way. I have watched newspaper ads and when possible I have been stocking up the canned and boxed items we'd need for winter. Also, when I have seen a good meat sale, I try to get a little extra. I give HIM all praise.

Some of you know how much I have prayed and prayed for a newer computer. A laptop computer was GIVEN to me TODAY! Nothing wrong with it. All it's needed pieces and parts come with it. I stand in awe and amazement at our great God!

Job and all his messes...........yet He praised the Lord. Habakkuk and all his challenges and trials......yet He praised the Lord. The Apostle Paul and all his physical pain........yet he praised the Lord. Paul and Silas was thrown in jail for no reason............as they SANG, they praised the Lord.

I pray it can be said of me...................even tho.................yet I will praise HIM!

Til next time..............keep that Bible open..............hugs to all..............Dea

Things they are a changin'...........

2008-07-05T17:31:00.000-07:00

Seldom is change a pleasant thing. I'll be at the ripe old age of 57 come the end of October and personally, I do not like change. I like things settled. I like things organized. I like somewhat of a routine. When things must change, I don't know about you, but change is really difficult for me.

I found myself faced with a really tough decision. I had the opportunity to have a job 15 minutes from my house. No more driving 30 miles one way. No more slapping myself in the face to keep me awake getting to work on an early morning shift or a late night shift. No more having to get up two hour ahead to get dressed and make sure I had at least 45 minutes to an hour to get to work. Dad always taught me to never be late. He always taught me to plan for the unexpected. He always said if one was some place too early, that left time to talk to God, or write a letter, or just to rest a few minutes. With having to drive so far, I wanted to allow for the unexpected so I'd not show up late for work. If I changed jobs, I wouldn't have to get up and start two hours ahead of time.

Even with all the positive things about changing the job, it was still a very difficult decision for me to make. Why? I felt like I was abandoning ship. I felt like I was letting down my friends and family that I had at my job. I knew they needed help daily. I didn't want to leave any of them. I always tried to be positive. I always tried to encourage my family and friends there to laugh. Laughing a lot sure helped with what seemed like endless stress that came with the job. Who would laugh with them now?

Isn't it just like our God to allow obstacles thrown at us while we're trying to make a tough decision! During my decision making time, a coworker (a believer) came to me about a family crisis. This person came to me in confidence and asked me to pray. A few days later they came to me again so distraught over the crisis. I shared Bible with this person. I hugged this person. Who would do that if I left?

One of my dearest friends from work told me the week before I left, "I tell everyone you are my Kmart therapy. You're just the best therapist." I knew I was leaving by then.......and I nearly cried.

So many of my coworkers had become my family and friends. They had been a part of my life and my personal family life for nearly 5 years. Often they touched my heart in ways I cannot share. I did not want to leave. But........

God told me it was time. God told me He no longer needed me there and He told me to move on. There was a time in my life when God and I would have argued a long while over it. This time, we didn't. I knew in my mind and heart, God had opened the door and it was time for me to move on.

I suppose to some I took the chicken way out. It was never meant to be that way. I knew I had to give proper notice. I wanted to leave in good standing. When I told our personnel that I was leaving I asked that not one word be said to anyone. I didn't want anyone to know I was leaving. I knew I was doing what was best for Bill and I, for Mom, for my family, and for the first time in my life, for myself. I quietly went to work there, and I wanted to quietly leave.

There are two friends there that became like sisters to me. The laughter we shared, the fun we had, the tears we shared.........I had to tell them. When the weather was really bad or if the work schedule so heavy I couldn't drive home and shouldn't, they opened their home to me. The couch was mine and even now, it's still mine. It wasn't easy to tell them, but I did. I know they didn't really like it, but I also know I have left with their love, their support, and their door always open. I asked them also to keep quiet about my leaving and they respected my request.

Why the silence about my leaving? It was easier for me and if making it easier for me made me look like a chicken, then so be it. I've been thru a lot over the past several years. The stress and strain and loss in my life has mounted up pretty high. I continue to learn to do what I have to to deal with the stresses of life. For me to leave was easier by just going without any fuss, without any fanfare. I have no regrets.

Into my new work place I went with my head held high. I knew I still had my good friends and family. I knew that emails and snail mail and visits on occasion would see to that. But most important, I knew I was doing what God wanted of me at this time in my life.

I can't begin to find words to explain how great it is to drive 15 minutes and be at work. After a days work, 15 minutes and I'm home. I drive right past where Mom lives and when my schedule allows me, I can stop in anytime and visit with her all I want. If Mom has an emergency no one hast to wait for me to show up. My sister is five minutes from where I work. If I'm needed, they have easy and quick access to me. Do we have a God of detail or what!!!!

When I was hired I thought I was going to work with clothing, ect. After the second interview, I was asked if I'd consider taking a job as a cash register operator. I nearly went thru the roof with excitement and said, "Sure I would." I'm telling you God never ceases to amaze me!

My body is worn and battered. All that floor retail work has taken it's toll but I'd keep on doing it if that's what was asked of me. God has decided it's time for me to take it easy. I'm doing nothing except going in to work, visiting with lots of people, and running a cash register. I swear I feel like I'm on vacation every day! I actually have energy left after I get home! For years, that was unheard of. I'd crawl home and get a shower and get on a heating pad and wait for the body to allow me to lay down. I am meeting new people all the time. I am visiting with old friends I haven't seen in years. It's great!

God knows I am a bit talkative. (Okay, you guys that are saying back to yourself under your breath, "a bit" talkative......straighten up! Remember God knows what you think!) God has placed me into a wide open mission field and God knows I won't be silent. I have already had opportunity to share with several customers "God stuff!" It's great!

I enjoy going to work and I enjoy getting up to go to work! Absolutely amazing! It's been years since I've been able to say that! I give God all praise! This is God. This is a God thing and God taking care of me and working out details I never even thought about.

You will not believe what else! I am going to church! I have gone home! As long as I can afford gas in my car, I am attending Sunday morning services in the Baptist church I grew up in. The first time I went, I was priviledged to sit among the "roses" of the church. I saw three of my "former" youth leader young ladies sitting in a row with space for me. I was so blest to get to talk with them and share with them a few minutes before services. To be with them and "listen" to them still sing......what a major, major blessing! I stood my ground when I was hired. They asked on the employment application what times we are available each day of the week. When it came to Sunday, I told them I wasn't available until 2pm on Sunday afternoons. They respect that and have no problem with it. I have learned my lesson. I will not change my mind. I will not give in and do any favors for just one Sunday or whatever. I am not available for work until 2:00 in the afternoons on Sundays! Those of you who follow my babblings in this blog might recall I wrote about needing preached at. Praise the Lord! I am being preached at!

Life is hard. The burdens in my life remain. The heartaches are still here. But God has answered so much prayer about me a job, I can only continue in praise to Him.

"I sought the Lord and He heard me and delivered me.....This poor woman cried out, and the Lord heard her and saved her out of all her troubles....O taste and see that the Lord is good: Blessed is the woman who trusts in Him.....There is no want to those who respect Him." Psalms 34

I'm not perfect. Often I feel as if I should receive no blessings. Often I feel that God should not even listen to my prayers or take care of my needs. But, God remains faithful and I keep trying. He knows my heart!

Blessings to all.......read a Bible verse every day........and laugh a lot..........God will get us thru it.........no matter what "it" is! Hugs, Dea

Good News, Vacation, Hugs, and Stuff

2008-06-08T14:14:00.000-07:00

Seems God thought we needed a great big HUG from Him a whole lot sooner than June. I am pleased to announce that Brock Andrew "Kelii" Sipes arrived at 4:03 p.m. on May 23, 2008.....eight hours BEFORE Grandpa Bill's birthday. He weighed in at 8lbs. 13 oz. and 21" long. What a great gift for Grandpa and to all of us. Brock wasn't support to be born til June, at least the doctors didn't think so. Brock and family are all doing well. I need to explain "Kelii." Mommy is of Hawaiian decent and all her children are given a Hawaiian name by her grandmother. Great Grandma decided Brock's Hawaiian name should be "Kelii," which in Hawaiian means, "Chief." What a needed blessing this is for our family.

I've been on vacation and I wanted to share it with all of you. I'm sure you'll think my vacation was a bit "different" shall we say, but nonetheless, I'll not question the vacation God sent my way.

I opened my email the other day to find an email shared with me that had all these really neat and funny pictures of animals. They were showing pictures of animals that don't normally get along. As I scrolled down thru the pictures I saw a kitten playing with baby ducks. Not chasing them or trying to cause them harm. They were playing. There was the dog and the cat laying together with their "arms" around each other like they were hugging each other. I saw a horse being curious about a duck. There were far too many pictures for me to list them all. I believe my favorite was the one with the orangutan and the dog. My how it looked like they was dearly enjoying their time together and their "hugs" to each other.

You may laugh and say, "Dea, that's no vacation." For me it was. For those few brief moments in time, I rested. I enjoyed myself. I laughed. I didn't cry over my mom. I didn't fuss over personal problems in my son's life. I didn't stew about broken and hurting grandchildren. I didn't mourn over the loss of my stepdaughter. I didn't have work on my mind. No, for those few moments in time, I was on vacation. It felt good. I am thankful I didn't miss it.

I remember reading in the New Testament often about Jesus going to the mountians. Why? To rest and be alone. Jesus knew how important it was to be refreshed and renewed. It seemed the times He'd go to the mountains would be after big events in His life and times of difficult challenges for Him. What an example we have to follow. It doesn't say that Jesus booked a flight on a camel run and went off to some gorgeous beach and layed in the sun for days to rest and renew. Jesus took advantage of what was available to Him. He went into a quiet place of creation and prayed, rested, and was renewed. Nothing expensive. Nothing popular. Jesus took advantage of what He had. I can't encourage any of us enough to make sure we don't get so wrapped up in our challenges and stresses that we miss the "vacations" God allows for us.

If that wasn't renewing enough, God and I went to Alaska the other night. As I watched the Travel Channel on TV, I saw so many different wonders I'd never seen before. As much as I cannot stand cold weather and snow, the ice and the glaciers God has made in that part of our country are absolutely magnificent. I got to see the hump back whales as they went up and down in the ocean. What a wonder! I saw so many beautiful places of scenery in greens and blues, and reds, and yellows. I saw moose, I saw children play. I saw a HUGE ocean liner that takes people to this wonderful part of our country. They say they usually take up to 2000 tourist on one trip. I'm not much of a water person, and I really don't like boats or ships. I think I'd rather sit in my office with God and see His wonders here where it's safe.

God not only allowed me this wonderful vacation but the other day I believe I got the BIGGEST HUG of the century from Him. The challenges and heartaches with Mom have been so wearing on all of us. Mom and I have been so close all my life, to see her slowly wilt away is tough. Early last week I went to visit her and I couldn't get her to wake up. That's never happened before. There wasn't anything really wrong, she just wouldn't wake up to visit with me. Even the administrator tried to wake her, and Mom wasn't waking up . I know she's in God's hands, and I know more times like are going to happen. But, it bothered me. It bothered me more than I can explain.

Two days later I had the day off and went to visit her again. This time I found an alert, upbeat mom. We chatted and talked and even laughed together and oh how good that felt! Mom began scratching the palm of her hand. I said, "Mom, that's so cool." She asked, "What?" I told her, "You're scratching the palm of your hand and you always told us when that happens it means you're going to get a lot of money." Mom replied, "Oh boy! I hope I get a bunch of money." I said, "Mom what on earth would you do with the money if you did get?" Mom pulled her little throw quilt up to her chest and very plainly said, "I'd give it to my kids." I nearly cried. I said back to her, "Mom, we know how much you've always done for us. We know. You'll never know how much we appreciate all that you have done for us." Mom pulled the quilt a little closer to her neck, closed her eyes and said, "Yes I do."

WHAT A HUG! What an awesome hug from our awesome God! What a memory He has given to me to remember in the days to come. Mom remains very safe in God's hands. We wait. We don't like it. We ask for His mercy to take her on home to all the glorious things she has waiting for her. For us kids, Mom doesn't deserve this slow way of wilting away. But God sees the whole picture. We trust Him. To God all of this is just a brief moment in His time. We know He knows best......and we wait.

I encourage you to keep those ears and eyes open to those vacation times. I wouldn't want any of us to miss any minute of a vacation God provides.

"The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill and to destroy. I HAVE COME THAT YOU MAY HAVE LIFE, AND THAT YOU MAY HAVE IT MORE ABUNDANTLY. I am your Good Shepherd...." John 10:10-11

Til next time.....................stay in the Word....................DEA

Praises and Challenges..........

2008-05-26T16:14:00.000-07:00

Greetings to one and all........

Since last I wrote so much has happened in my life, yet God has sustained me.

In early May we found ourselves dealing with complete loss of house and content of our youngest son's house. We rejoice and praise God that no one was home. Shad has been working in Louisiana and the kids live with their mom in Norwalk. The main thing, the best thing.......no one was home and no one was hurt.

The firemen tell us the house was completely gone within ten to fifteen minutes. That tells us that an accelerant was used and the fire burned hot and quickly.

So many calls had been placed to Shad in Louisiana but God remains in control. Not one of the calls or messages had reached Shad. It was not until 10 am the morning of the fire that Bill was able to reach Shad and tell him what had happened. I find God's hand in that. He was told of his loss by his dad, not a friend, not a stranger. Shad flew home as soon as he could get a flight.
The fire was early on a Tuesday morning. He did not get a good look until Wednesday in the daylight hours. By the time he got here, it was dark and he couldn't see much. He saw plenty on Wednesday.

Everyone asks about the cause of the fire. It pains this mother more than I can ever express that the fire has not been officially ruled yet, but the fire was arson. The fire was purposely set. In the daylight hours on Wednesday, the only piece of a wall standing we saw a message left for our son. It was obscene. It is not something I would care to repeat or share with anyone. The hurt in our hearts knowing that someone purposely done this is beyond explanation. To think someone is so hateful, vicious, and mean to one of your kids is a lot for any parent to handle.

"and the peace of God that passes all understanding will rule in your heart and mind." Philippians 4:7

As investigating continues, I find peace and rest knowing that God knows who has done this horrible thing. If WE never know, God knows and we know God will deal with the guilty person in His time, in His way.

On May 23rd, 2008, at 4:03 p.m. Brock Andrew (Kelii) Sipes was sent to us as a blessing beyond words. Mommy has Hawaiian ancestors and the name Kelii is given to him in honor of that. It means, "Chief." His great grandmother on mommy's side of the family picks the Hawaiian names for the kids. Brock weighs in at 8 lbs. 13 oz and a nice 21 inches long. He has very long fingers and looks so much like his dad, our son, Gerry. Gerry never left the hospital. He stayed thru the labor, the delivery, and came home when mom and baby did. Mommy was allowed to rest while Daddy took care of Brock in the hospital. Mommy was so surprised and so appreciative of Gerry's help. I wasn't at all surprised.........I knew he'd make a good dad and a very helpful one. I give God all praise for this little guy.........he is such a blessing for so many reasons.

My heart continues to ache over my Mom. Mother is not at all well and Mom needs to go on to heaven, but evidently it's not God's time. We had to make a decision about her difibulator......to shut it off or not. It was not an easy decision to make. Unless you have walked in those shoes, you have no idea how difficult a decision that was. Together, the four of Mom's remaining children supported each other and decided it was best for Mom to have it shut off. The electrical current coming from the defibulator was no longer helping her. It was causing her pain. We didn't want that.

Mentally Mom is no longer in existence, at least the Mother we knew and grew up with. Mom is often confused and "way out there." Sister and I stand amazed because she has not forgotten one time who we are. Mom always knows Sister and I and for that we are so grateful. We continue to wait for God to decide it is time. We don't understand. We don't like the waiting and we don't feel any of this is fair to Mom. But, God remains in control. He sees the entire picture and He's just not ready for Mom to go home yet. We pray for His mercy!

Recently I read an interview by Rick Warren, (Purpose Driven Life author), pastor of the Saddleback Church in California. Thru his interview God reminded me that He is far more interested in my character than in my comfort. God is more interested in making my life holy than He is in making my life happy. I was reminded that although I could be reasonably happy here on earth, that's not to be my goal. My goal is to grow in character into the likeness of Christ. It's hard, isn't it? It's hard to remember these things and keep applying these things to our life. My cousin sent me an article the other day that was just awesome. The main subject of the article was to START AGAIN. No matter what it is I don't have quite right in my life, no matter what it is I feel I've failed at and no matter how OFTEN I've failed at the same thing, I am to START AGAIN. In some areas of my life, I feel like all I do is start over. I guess God's still has lots of "character" to build in me, huh!

I continue to fill out applications any place I can to get a different job. The expense of driving 60 miles round trip for a part time job is taking it's toll. I continue to pray that God will open the door for me a job closer to home. I would LOVE to be able to stay at home and work, but I haven't found a trustworthy business safe to take on. I keep praying that God will show me where He needs me and if no other door opens, I have to trust that He still needs me right where I am. I don't understand..........but I trust!

The challenges are many.........but the blessings far outweigh the challenges and it is thru these blessings, thru the hugs from God that I am given strength to keep on keeping on. My Aunt Freda will be 90 in July. She is my dad's only living sister and is the oldest of his family. Aunt Freda and I have always been close. When I was younger, I'd go spend weeks with her in the summertime. It was great! We have always written back and forth to each other. I love her dearly!

Aunt Freda has always had this HUGE violet sitting on a table in the kitchen facing the east. It is the biggest violet I've ever seen. A few weeks back she mailed me a start from it. To say I was a little concerned for this dear plant coming thru the mail is an understatement. It arrived in a yellow envelope......not spongy...just yellow. She has gotten a paper towel wet and wrapped the roots in the paper towel and then placed the start and towel in a zip lock bag, stuck it in this envelope and mailed it. I knew not to touch it. I knew that all I should do was get it out of the envelope, place it in the kitchen sink and wait for my green thumb husband, Bill, to rescue it. I did run a little water on the roots because I knew it needed a drink and only the roots.

Bill immediately rescued it and placed it in dirt. He didn't give this violet much of a chance but I knew he'd tried his best.

I pray I never get so caught up in my challenges, my heartaches, my trials in life that I miss out on one of God's hugs. One morning recently I walked into my kitchen to see a beautiful dark purple bloom on this pitiful looking violet! Talk about a hug from God! I gave Him praise for it! Bill was so surprised as well! He thought it'd take a very long time for this violet to grow, let alone bloom!

Below are suggestions from Rick Warren from the interview I read. Read them carefully and absorb them. There is such truth here:
Happy moments, PRAISE GOD.
Difficult moments, SEEK GOD.
Quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD.
Painful moments, TRUST GOD.
Every moment, THANK GOD.

Although I have nothing but respect for Pastor Warren, I would prefer my own list:

Happy and sad moments, PRAISE GOD!
Difficult moments, SEEK AND PRAISE GOD!
Quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD LOUDLY!!
Painful moments, TRUST AND THANK GOD!
Every moment of every day, THANK AND PRAISE GOD!

Pray for us folks..............until next time..............

Is It Well With YOUR Soul?

2008-05-08T04:21:00.000-07:00

"Be anxious for nothing, but in EVERYTHING by prayer and supplication, WITH THANKSGIVING, LET your requests be made known to God: and the PEACE OF GOD, WHICH PASSES ALL UNDERSTANDING, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

In early April, our 7 year old grandson fell and broke the femur bone in his left leg right above the knee. He was flown to Toledo Children's Hospital where surgery was performed and he remains in a full body cast at this writing. He will remain in the body cast for several weeks yet and eventually go into a one leg cast. Justin is going to be okay. His healing process and return to normal will be very, very long.

On April 22, 2008, my stepdaughter, Bill's oldest daughter passed away at the age of 42. She had suffered a long, horrible dying process. At her service on Friday, Bill was not recognized at all as her dad, yet our sons were recognized as her stepbrothers.

Work conditions at work remain such a challenge. I know it is the same everywhere. The work load is so heavy and so few to work. It's really hard on my coworkers and I. When you are in constant pain and don't feel good anyway.......well.......working can be a challenge let alone under difficult circumstances.

Early Tuesday morning, May 6, I was called with the news our youngest son's house had burnt to the ground. Shad has been working in Louisiana for weeks. We are so grateful no one was at home. He has lost everything. It was 14 months ago an electrical fire caused substantial damage to this same house. Shad told us he thought someone was trying to tell him he wasn't suppose to have a house there.

Just yesterday,(May 7),I was called and asked to help make a major decision concerning Mom. Mom's heart is trying to stop but the defibulator is not allowing it to. Mom was constantly being shocked by electrical current which causes her a lot of pain. My sister, two brothers, and I had been given two choices.

Mom's life remains in God's hands just as it always has been. I don't care what is done to her or for her here on this earth, God remains in control. Mom will not go home one second sooner than what is God's own timing. The decision was made to have the defibulator disconnected saving Mom from the pain she was having from it. Mom will not go one minute sooner than God intends. I rest in that.

Yesterday as I sat with Mom, we did our own thing just as we have all my life. We laughed, we talked, we hugged. We sang, "I've got a mansion just over the hilltop. In that fair land where we'll never grow old. Then some day yonder we will never more wander, but walk the streets that are pure as gold."

Will I miss Mom? More than anyone will ever be able to understand. But Mom is ready to go and I am ready to let her go. Every breath Mom has taken her entire life has been for her kids. She's fought her fight, she's finished her course. When God's ready for Mom, she'll go. So many loved ones and friends will be waiting for her. Yesterday she spoke often of how good it will be to see "Dad and Mom." Her parents are waiting and so is Dad.

Prayer warriors I don't even know have responded to the requests made for my family and I. I stand amazed in God's presence of how He continues to make sure WE are being taken care. Not just Mom, not just Justin, not just Shad, but the family around these difficulties is being ministered to, hugged, and prayed for by our awesome God in ways I continue to stand amazed at. I must give HIM all praise.

Is it easy? No! Someone suggested to me that I didn't have a "platefull" but rather a "platter." I have to laugh! PLEASE, PLEASE.......do not make any suggestions to our God! The platefull is enough........I don't even want God to think I could handle a platter, and hopefully God did not hear such a suggestion!

I received a HUGE hug from God yesterday when He sent me a writing titled "When Your Hut Is On Fire." I shared it with many. I am confident that it was God's perfect timing to send that article to me just hours after our son lost every material thing he had. What a hug it was!

I am reminded of Habakkuk. Habakkuk stood and looked at all he didn't have. There was no cattle in the fields, no fruit on the vines. Habakkuk had his own platefull just like I do. Yet, Habakkuk was able stand and say, "...even tho......YET I WILL TRUST IN HIM..." Habakkuk 3:17-19

"When peace like a river attendeth the way. When sorrow like sea billiows roll. Whatever my lot it has taught me to say, IT IS WELL, IT IS WELL WITH MY SOUL."

Is it well with your soul?

Dea, May 8, 2008

I'm Still Here......By God's Grace

2008-04-11T15:36:00.000-07:00

I know, it's been a while. I know at least one person has noticed my absence from my blog so if I count God, that would make two. I offer no apology for my absence. Believe it or not, I haven't had anything to say.

It is certainly by God's grace that I am here. If I had a kid like me, I'd sent her packing a long time ago. Ever have a time in your life when the harder you try the behinder you get? I'm sure I'm probably the ONLY one of God's kids that have ever had such an experience.

I have no one to blame but myself. A couple years ago I caved in to pressure and agreed to work the really early morning hours on Sundays to help with the ad signs for our weekly flyer. Big mistake, and I know that now. I NEED PREACHED AT! I agreed to work as long as I was off work to attend church services. First it was extended to six hours........then more six hour Sundays.......then more.........then eight hours........then more eight hours. I NEED PREACHED AT! Now I find myself at the mercy of my employer and I haven't been to services in way too long.

I suppose there are a lot of His kids roaming around on this earth that doesn't NEED to go to Sunday services. I AM NOT one of them. The only way I tow the line, the only way I can stay challenged to dig in the word, the only way I can stay on the straight and narrow is to attend services, worship the Lord with all my heart AND GET PREACHED AT!

My husband, Bill, has been a believer forever. I do believe if he passes in the next few minutes he'd wake up in heaven. But, Bill is one of those believers that does just fine with God and for God and doesn't need Sunday services. He said he can sit in a chair at home, stand on the porch, go sit in the bathroom and have Sunday services with God just like I do in a church. That's amazing to me. I know God is everywhere. I know God hears me no matter where I am. I am forevermore praising Him and I am constantly humming or singing songs of praise and the old hymns. But, I NEED PREACHED AT!

I don't know if it's because I was raised to be in church or what. Dad was determined that every time the door of the church was open.......we were there. Until I was a senior in high school, that never bothered me. It was something to do and I had friends to see and in between all that, I did learn a lot. I started my short lived rebellion in my senior year of school so at that point I didn't appreciate being EXPECTED in services every time the door opened. I am a child of the 60's..........enough said!

No one knows how much I long to hug my Dad now and tell him how grateful I am that he was determined to keep us in services every time the door was open. I still miss my Dad so much. It'll be 5 years in July since God took him home. For me, it's seems like it was so much longer ago than that.

I still pray. I can still read scripture and even the Daily Bread devotional. That little book amazes me. I swear every day I read it what is said just simply FITS for that day! I LONG FOR THE HOURS OF STUDY WITH MY HEAVENLY FATHER! I long for it. I can't find it anymore. I simply cannot find it.

There was hardly a service that I attended that I did not HEAR someone say something from the Word that made me want to go "dig" deeper. I NEED to dig deeper. I try........it's just not there.

The spiritual side of me continues to tell me that God trusts me right where I am. That's an honor, ya know! No matter what circumstance YOU find yourself in, if you are one of God's kids, be honored! God trusts you right where you are with exactly what you have, or you'd not be where you are or have what you have. God trusts me! I guess I just don't trust myself.

God trusted me to bury my brother and my Dad within five months of each other. God trusts me to deal on a daily basis with a Mom completely lost in the world of dementia. God trusts me to be a sister, a mom, a grandmother, an aunt, a wife, a friend, AND an employee..........and He trusts me to be all that and not go to services! If I should be honored........then why on earth do I feel such failure, such loss deep in my soul!

I've often spoken of how I love to read the Psalms. Please don't tell my Dad but I've been reading in the NEW King James version! I came across the first few words of Psalms 86:17, "Show me a sign for good......"

As I closed my Bible and headed out the door for work very early that morning, I remembered those words. I walked out on my back porch into a time of day that God had stayed up half the night to paint for me. I had never seen such a gorgeous night sky. The stars just twinkled and shined as I had never seen them before. I had not seen so many stars either. There were dark clouds mingled in with all those gorgeous stars and the moon was about half a moon. It was the most beautiful sight to me!

As I thought of those six words from Psalms, I thought how pitiful that we humans NEED to SEE God DO something. That morning, by God's grace, I saw God! Not a sign from God for good! Not something that was going to give ME anything materially. God had stayed up and painted such a gorgeous sight so that I could see HIS goodness in this land of the living! In those brief moments that I stood and praised Him and honored Him, I saw Him. I saw a version of God I'm sure He doesn't trust just everyone with. What better "sign for good" could there be but Him!

Maybe it's time I trusted myself more..........maybe Bill has it far more together with God than I'll ever understand. Me? I STILL feel I NEED PREACHED AT! By God's grace, I'm still here........and I pray I never forget those moments with God when He trusted me to SEE a "sign for good." As always, it was HIS way...........and that's as it should be!

Til next time............stay in the Word! Know that I care, I covet your continued prayer support for my family and I and know that I pray for you and your family.......hugs to all..........Dea

Steps to Getting Close to God

2008-02-25T16:32:00.000-08:00

So much seems to be on my mind these days. How precious His Word has been to me lately. Very early this morning I read: "Cast your burden on the Lord and He will sustain you: He will NEVER allow the righteous to be moved." Psalms 55:22 What a promise!!

A new grandson on the way, the health I do have, love of family, prayer warriors who pray, a warm place to stay, food to eat, a job, friends, deodorant, ketcup, shampoo, scotch tape, Sadie my cat, Cheyenne my cat Bill got for me, a hug from our youngest, laughter with our two year old grandson, new underwear, a brand new washer, (wow! not used! BRAND NEW!) a visit with a very special aunt I seldom see, safety every day, back rubs, massager for my muscles, pickles.....my list could go on and on just counting my blessings! God has been so good. I cannot praise Him enough!

"Father, Grace for today. Strength for today. Forgiveness for today. Courage and boldness for today. Protection for today. Mental, physical, emotional, personal, material, and SPIRITUAL healing for today.......for these things I pray, Father, and not just for myself but for all my family, loved ones, and friends that You have so blest me with! I give YOU praise!"

"As for me, I will call upon God, and the Lord shall save me. Evening and morning and at noon, I will pray, and cry aloud, and HE SHALL HEAR MY VOICE. He has given my soul peace from the battleS that are against me." Psalms 55:16-18

Did you take the time to read your Bible and have time with God today? If you've taken the time to read this blog..........then you've read your Bible and shared my time with God............keep on keeping on......receive His peace that He freely gives to all of us.............hugs to all.......Dea

Stress Relief

2008-02-11T17:39:00.000-08:00

Greetings to all......thanks for taking the time to check in on me. I realize that this is definitely the week associated with love and all that. My brother passed away on Valentine's Day five years ago. It's kinda hard for me to get excited over Valentine's Day anymore. Anyway, I don't have thoughts on love at this writing. Below you will find some thoughts I shared over an email someone shared with me. Take my word for it, when I saw an email with suggestions to relieve stress......I couldn't get it read fast enough. I pray God becomes more real as you read each word. If you get a laugh along the way, then God has accomplished something great within you as you read. Enjoy...........

WAYS TO REDUCE STRESS

1. Pray (ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS, AND ALWAYS!!!!!!!)

2. Go to bed on time. (Being an adult, how do I know when "on time" is?)

3. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed. (Now, listen, I'm too old to be rushed anywhere under any circumstances!!!!)

4. Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health. (First, ya have to have a mind in order to be concerned about your mental health. I lost my mind a very long time ago!!!! Second, I'm very flexible. I do what I need to but learned not to stress myself with a rough schedule.)

5. Delegate tasks to capable others. (Gee, there's really CAPABLE others out there?!!! CAPABLE is definitely the key word here)

6. Simplify and un clutter your life. (Ya can't get any more simple than I am! Un clutter? How do I do that when I have two dogs and two cats that want to sleep with me!)

7. Less is more. Although one is often not enough, two are often too many. (I cannot imagine a world with two of me........it definitely would be WAY TOO many)

8. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places. (I don't think my dad was ever late for anything.......I learned from him!!!!)

9. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together. (What does one do when changes and difficult stuff just seems to lump itself together in your life and keeps on coming and coming and coming! Is there ever any rest from it!!!!!)

10. Take one day at a time. (AMEN! AND AGAIN I SAY, AMEN!)

11. Separate worries from concerns . If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety . If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it. (AMEN AGAIN! I'm gona get baptiscostal if I keep reading all this good stuff!)

12. Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases. (What's "ordinary?" I have not experienced "ordinary in ages! A budget? Am I the only one that struggles with that with our economy such a mess? These days I'm sure thankful God is my Provider.)

13. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc. (An extra prayer warrior to pray when you can't)

14. K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble. (Anyone got an enormous amount of duct tape? It'd take a major miracle for this mouth to be kept shut!!!!)

15. Do something for the Kid in You everyday. (Does eating chocolate count?)

16. Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting. (Read a Psalms EVERY DAY! You'll be amazed at the encouragement you get from it!)

17. Get enough rest. (Sure, no problem!!!!)

18. Eat right. (Does that mean I can't eat all that's LEFT anymore?!!!)

19 Get organized so everything has its place. (If I get anymore organized........I'll not be able to find myself. I think I'm entirely too detailed minded........too organized at times! Sometimes I want to just make a mess so I'll feel like the rest of the world!)

20. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life. (I miss not having a tape player in my car! I'd LOVE to have a complete copy of the KJV Bible on cd just to be able to listen to someone else read His Word. I keep praying God will provide so I could get one!!!!)

21. Write down thoughts and inspirations. (I'm such a blabberbox even when I write!!!!)

22. Every day, find time to be alone. (Yep......I'm one of those people who have to have THEIR space! I like my quiet!!!! Remember even Jesus knew how important it was to have time ALONE!!!!)

23. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to try to pray. (He's always with me. He rides in the car with me. Often "we've" prayed my way thru bad weather. I have found MORE GOD in so many ways...........I try to treat Him just like a friend I see all the time. He's right here.......with me......all the time!!!! Joshua 1:9)

24. Make friends with Godly people. (If they hug they MUST be Godly people, don't ya think? I love my Cabbage Patch dolls because they always have their arms out waiting for a hug. I could listen to my Aunt Woneda pray all day. Talk about making friends with Godly people. My goodness that lady KNOWS how to pray and makes friends with everyone that hears her. For so many reasons, we need Godly people. If you are blest to find Godly people who really PRAY, you are a very, very rich person. I'm such a problem child, God has me surrounded with praying people and I love every one of them.)

25. Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand. (I've been told the BEST folder to have is your head! MEMORIZE is key!)

26. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good "Thank you Jesus." (Don't just thank Him for the BIG things! THANK Him, thank Him , thank Him!!!!)

27. Laugh. (At yourself, with your friends, with your family, with your husband, over the newspaper, over sports, while taking a shower.....while eating, just LAUGH!!)

28. Laugh some more! (And more and more and more.......not possible to do too much laughing..)

29. Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all. (Trying to practice this advice is what's kept me sane at this point of life. I screw up often and alot. I'd not know what to do without HIS GRACE. My work? Well, no matter what I do.......I'm a daughter of the King. I represent Him and want to do a good job so my Heavenly Father doesn't look bad.)

30. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can). (If God can constantly forgive me..........how can I hold things against others! God has really helped me in this area of life.)

31. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most). (Does this mean I have to be nice to people I work with that are not nice! What a struggle that can be but I am often reminded of the women at the well that Jesus spoke to. He showed her compassion and love and understanding........and I'm sure it wasn't easy for Him. If He can.........then I'll keep trying to live up to His standard. Boy......some people sure make it hard, huh!)

32. Sit on your ego. (I've never felt ego was a real problem for me. It's taken me a long time in life to accept who I am in Christ. Insecure. Not capable. Not good enough. Worthless. Those are all words that were in my vocabulary toward myself for many, many years. It's not been easy, but God has brought me a long way............I've never seen having an ego as a problem. Maybe I'm blind.........)

33 Talk less; listen more. (I know......I'm the blabberbox, BUT.......God has brought me a long way and I feel I am better at listening now than I use to be. I keep trying to improve and I keep looking for bigger rolls of duct tape!!!)

34. Slow down. (If I get any slower, a turtle is gona be able to pass me with no trouble at all. I'm old. I'm slow.....but when I do a job, it's done right the first time. When I pass a pretty flower.....I see it. When a bird sings outside, I hear it. When the moon is full and the sky so gorgeous at night.........I enjoy it and talk to God about it. When the kids are laughing.......I hear them. When my husband snores, I hear him and am thankful he is still with me and I can hear him snore!!!!)

35. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe. (Can you believe a "professional" person told me one time that I had a Jesus complex? I wanted to bop them in the nose. No way could I ever think I was Jesus. Yet.........I began to understand what I was being told as I continued to grow in Christ. I CANNOT take care of everyone and everything. I cannot be ALL THINGS TO ALL PEOPLE. My goodness it took me YEARS to understand that. I have been given an overwhelming desire to help. To help everyone, anyone, and everybody. No matter the circumstances, I want to help. I continue to learn that the MOST POWERFUL thing I can DO for everyone, anyone and everybody is to PRAY. I can pray.........I'll let God take care of the rest! Boy did things in life get easier once I got a grip on this!!!)

36 ... Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before. GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU. (Now if you don't think this is gona take some thinking......just give it a try! I'm still thinking. God has been soooooooooooooooo good to my family and I. I seem to always be thanking Him with nearly every breath. Something I'm thankful for I've not ever been thankful for before.........................I'm thinking..........with a thankful heart!!!)

"If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31)

I'm sure you're tired of reading my babblings right now. Kinda long blog, huh. Well, I have a special hug I wanted to share with ya. I stand amazed myself at the way God hugged me this week.

When we moved here five years ago, I had to buy one of those things to put behind the toilet in the small bathroom so towels, washclothes, and personal stuff could be kept in the bathroom. There was no place for such things in the little bathroom in our house. Off and on for a while, I've been thinking that it'd be NICE to have a new one. One with a shelve and one with a couple shelves with doors. I wanted to get something that would keep things safe so our little grandson would not get into anything that might hurt him. It wasn't a NEED. It was something I put way down at the bottom of my wish list and thought maybe before the year was over, I'd be able to get one. Well...........I was walking thru my work place the other day, (I work in retail) and for no particular reason, I walked down the aisle that had those shelving things. With my handheld scanner, I scanned one that was sitting in the wrong place. I nearly fainted. I looked at the picture of it. It was EXACTLY what I had in mind. Wood. Beautiful glass doors. A shelve for towels. The top was nice and smooth to sit something pretty on. The normal retail price was $69.99. God provided it for me for just $7.00. GIVE HIM A SHOUT OF PRAISE! Is that just not the neatest thing! I wasn't looking for one. It wasn't a NEED. I don't spend money these days or any days past on things unless it is a need. God knows my heart. I felt His arms around me hugging me tight and telling me it was alright to take the unit home and to spend the $7 on it. Earlier last week I'd found baby things on sale again that I purchased to donate to a baby place I know can use them. I spent 50 cents for toddler cups........45 cents for pacificers. I bought several because I know the need is great at the baby place I speak of. I have them here saving them until I get a bag full of things and then I'll make sure they get taken to the baby place. I felt like God had already given back to me for getting for the babies. When God lead me to that bathroom unit I wanted.......I felt His presence. I saw Him smiling and laughing because He saw MY heart and knew I had nothing but praise for Him.

"Delight myself also in the Lord, and HE WILL GIVE me the desires of my heart." Psalms 37:4

Thots on Resigning AND.........thanks..........

2008-01-24T16:50:00.000-08:00

I got up this morning with being thankful on my mind. It's Thursday.........I was encouraged many years ago to ASK God for nothing on Thursdays. Thank Him for what He has done, is doing, and is going to do. I try to practice that but sometimes it's hard.

By midmorning, I was in search of REST...............good, quiet, painless REST. When I took a shower, I slipped in the tub and jerked myself a good one. Wasn't bad enough I fell in the woods the other night.......now I'm gona need supervision in the shower. I'm THANKFUL I didn't fall. I slipped and I thanked God for keeping me up.......even though one foot and leg was in the tub and the other out of the tub and on the floor!

I took my time getting dressed and ready to go spend some time with Mom. It was a good visit but a visit of concern to me. Mother has decided to deal with being in the Manor by sleeping all the time with her head covered with a quilt. That's just not my Mom. I spoke at length with the nurse on duty and she has enough experience to know what she's talking about. Mom does anything they ask her to.......but when she's in the living room in a lounge chair.........on goes the blanket and she sleeps. I felt much better after the chat with the nurse, but it still concerns me. Mom has never done that, but...........she's never lived without a family member either.

By the time I got to the evening time, I was no longer looking for rest. I wanted to find the resignation desk. Where could I go to simply resign from life and not have to deal with anything, let alone one more thing? It's not important for me to detail all the things I have on my plate. It's a lot. The harder I try the behinder I get. The more I try to do life right, the more I do life wrong. I want to resign. Could someone please show me where the desk is to resign? I want to start the paperwork.

Finally my mind went back to the wee hours this morning with my awesome God. Here are the thoughts God gave to me:

Thanks.................T---------Thank You Father for choosing me! John 15:16 tells me, "You did not choose Me, but I chose you..." (Jesus is speaking in that verse.)

H--------Hallelujah I've been set free! John 8:36, "Therefore if the Son makes you free, YOU SHALL BE FREE INDEED." (Jesus is speaking)

A--------Answers to prayer have been amazing! Psalm 9:10, "...For you, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You. Matthew 7:7, "Ask, and it shall be given to you: seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened." (Jesus is speaking) A little boy I've been praying for is better and even home from the hospital. The brother of one of my bosses donated a kidney to his best friend. He and his best friend are home from the hospital already and doing just great! I've heard of much physical, emotional, mental, physical, personal, and spiritual healing in many lives around me. I've seen and heard of much NEED being met. That's God! That's God answering our prayers.

N--------Nice and quiet time alone with God! As I looked for Scripture to tie into this one, I noticed something today I'd never noticed before! Have you ever noticed that Matthew, Mark, Luke and John all tell of Jesus going into the mountains to pray? All four of these disciples felt it was important for us to know that Jesus was alone with the Father. Matthew 14:23, Mark 6:45, Luke 6:12, and John 6:3. If it was necessary and important for Jesus to have time alone with the Father...........how much MORE SO should it be for us? More today than ever in my life, I am thankful for my nice and quiet time alone with God!

K--------Know He is with me ALWAYS! Mom and I have a verse. Joshua 1:9, "Be strong and of good courage. Be not afraid for God is with us everywhere we go." Hebrews 13:5, ".....For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you or forsake you." That's a promise and God keeps His promises.

S---------Sins are forgiven everyday. I John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us..." My goodness I don't know what I'd do with His grace, His forgiveness, His understanding, and His longsuffering.

I am thankful that God chose me. I am thankful He has set me free. His answers to prayer are not always what I want. We did not get good news about a dear longtime friend of our families, but I KNOW God remains in control and I've seen amazing answers to prayer. I see from the disciples the importance of nice and quiet time with God and how precious it is to me. A major promise for me is that He will not leave me, (or Mom, or any of my family and friends I've been so blest with.) I give Him praise for forgiving me of my sins. I often do not understand how He can. So often I fall short.

So here I am at the end of another day. A day full of challenges. A day full of blessings. Oh, our little Gage was here today when I returned from a visit with Mom. He's so cute and adorable and such fun. The phone rang, he went and picked up the cordless phone, brought it to me and said, "just say hi!" Thru his innocence, God makes the rest of the world just go away! Between His Word and the blessings of my grandchildren, I guess I best stop looking for that desk to get the paperwork started! Guess I best stick around a while!

Keep us in your prayers! Never hesitate to comment on my babblings! I need to hear from you so I know what I need to do to improve this. I so desire that my blog pleases God and causes others to discover the MORE GOD that I continue to discover!

Did you read your Bible today? If you took the time to read this blog.........you did! It's been such a day, I think I'd better soak in some Psalms before I go to bed. Til next time........know that I'm praying for you.................Dea

A Monday on a Tuesday........

2008-01-22T17:44:00.000-08:00

For years I have been a advocate of skipping Mondays altogether and just go on to Tuesday. I seem to struggle with Mondays. But, since skipping it is not gona happen...........I accept my fate of Mondays and depend on God to get me thru them.

Today is Tuesday.............it started out like a Monday. The main breaker in our house decided to shut itself off. My husband, who is quite the handy man, couldn't get it to go back on and stay on. Without electric we have no heat. The wind was blowing so hard, but thank goodness it wasn't as cold as it was this past Sunday morning. My brother, Rick, is a liscensed electrician, so I called him. Thank goodness he was handy and had not gone out on a job yet. I explained the problem and he said he'd be out.

God and I had a good time waiting for Rick. I prayed and even used the flashlight to read my Bible and Daily Bread. It was great!

When Rick got here, he flipped the switch, you know, the same switch Bill tried to get to stay on, and of course Rick got it to come on and everything was just fine. We felt like goofbuckets. Rick took his electical gadget and tested wires and couldn't find any reason why the breaker did as it did. Makes me wonder what God was saving Rick from having him come here before going on the job!! Makes me wonder what God was saving US from having the breaker "mysteriously" shut itself off! I give Him praise! I trust God knew what He was doing.

A major blessing for me today was to be able to spend a little time with an old friend. We hug. It's great! I love the cabbage patch dolls and have several of them that others have bought for me. Why do I like them? Well.......when you see one take a good look. Their arms are always out waiting for a hug. I'm a hugger and there are people who pretend to hug and then there's people who really know how! No matter........I just love to hug. Makes me feel all warm and toasty inside.

"Psalms 22:11,14,15,19,22,23,24,25,27,31, "Be not far from me for trouble is near; for there is none to help. I am poured out like water and all my bones are out of joint, my strength is dried up.....But YOU, O Lord, don't be far from me, O my Strength, hurry to help me! You know I will declare YOUR NAME to everyone. In the midst of everyone, I will praise You. When I cried to You, You heard me. My praise shall be of You........All will remember and turn to You........They will come and declare Your greatness and will tell the new generation that it is YOU Who have done these great things for Dea and her family." (Dea's version)

After Dad died in 2003, Mother's health issues got worse. For the past 4 years she has been under the watchful eye of our youngest brother. He has taken excellent care of her. In the past year brother's own health has gotten bad, as well as health challenges with his wife. Mother's mind continues to get worse. After much prayer, after much waiting and seeking the Lord's help, the decision was made for Mother to go and live where professionally trained people can take care of her. It was the hardest thing for us to do. But, we know it was the right thing.

God provided a house just ten minutes from me where 14 other Senior citizens live. We know God worked out every detail because everything fell into place so quickly and easily for us to get her in that place. All last week it was one challenge after another with her. Brother was having all kinds of trouble with her. I'm 45 minutes away with a work schedule and all I could really do was to keep praying and keep making suggestions to try and keep Mom calm. I left her in God's hands because I knew He would make sure she was taken care of.

Daily I was called. I was called at work. There was no getting away from the situation and by weeks end...........I was one exhausted person. When the car quit on my way home, it would have been so easy for me to just throw in the towel and quit. But, I know nothing catches God off guard or catches Him by surprise. I ACCEPTED the FREE peace He gives to us. I accepted it.

Was it easy........not really. This is my Mom we're talking about. I know I could take better care of her than God can...............sure! Absolutely not! Mom was told in 2004 she had six months to a year left. I looked the doctor in the eye and said, "You don't know our mother and you don't know the God we know." Here she is, folks. Broken, frail, but strong in spirit and love for God and all of her family. God has Mom in a place now that is more centrally located so more family can spend time with her and be there with her and for her. She was so far away from most of us. God took care of that.

We tried to explain to the boss of the manor that Mom can be pretty strong willed. I think she'll believe us now. You see..........if the week's struggle wasn't enough, and the car breaking wasn't enough.........Mom got out of the home the second day she was there and they couldn't find her. Yep, Mom got out the door early Sunday morning.......no shoes, no coat......nothing but her nightgown on. Does anyone want to know the temperature Sunday morning, let alone the windchill?

I know it would be very easy to point fingers and find fault and really fuss. I refuse to do that. My family refuses to do that. You see, there was a problem with the alarms at the Manor and God knew they needed fixed. Mom helped to make sure they got fixed, and take my word for it, they are fixed. She'll not budge without the entire town knowing she is on the move! God knew there was a problem. He carefully watched over Mom and within a few minutes she was found. She was cold, but that was all. She was transported to the nearby hospital and was thoroughly checked out. She had fell but nothing was broken. Mom doesn't remember anything about her trip out. She hasn't a clue where she thought she was going. Seems to me there's a verse in the New Testament that tells us about the Shepherd knowing His sheep and if one is lost, He'll go find it. God didn't have a bit of trouble getting someone to Mom quickly. Problem with the alarms fixed. Everyone will be safe now.

Our God of detail never ceases to amaze me. I was at work at 5 a.m. on Sunday morning like I am every Sunday morning. I go in that early to put up the ad signs for the flyer that breaks that day. All of Mom's excitement happened between 5:30 a.m. and 6:00 a.m. Because Sister was so scared and so shook up, she forgot where I was and couldn't get anyone to answer the phone at my house. Our youngest brother straightened her out and she called me at work at 6:30 a.m. Mom was already on her way to the hospital. One brother was with her, the other on the way, and Sister on the way after she got in touch with me.

Remember the care breaking down? That was on Friday..........I was at work on Sunday morning WITH NO TRANSPORTATION. I had stayed with friends in town Saturday night so I could get to work on Sunday morning. Had I been called before they found Mom.............well........how would YOU react if you couldn't get to your mother under those circumstances?

I kept on praising Him. There is nothing but blessing after blessing thru this entire ordeal. I give our God all praise!

It's not easy. I do not always react in the right way. Today I screwed up big time. I didn't react properly to a situation at all. I am ashamed of myself because I know better. I have a friend that counted His grace and mercy as one of her greatest blessings.............I couldn't agree more. I John 1:9 tells me to "confess my sins and He is faithful and just to forgive and cleanse me from all unrighteousness." Did ya happen to notice that all we have to do is confess? It doesn't say we even have to ASK for forgiveness! I give Him praise!

Keep praying for Mom...........getting her adjusted is a real challenge because she always wants to go home with whoever is visiting.

Til next time............oh.........did you read your Bible any today? If you read this blog.......you did.........hugs to all.............

"The LORD is the STRENGTH of my life..."

2008-01-21T06:31:00.000-08:00

Phew! I was so thankful when Sunday came. That meant the start of a NEW week and the end of last week. Last week was another amazing trip with our awesome God down my journey of life with Him.

The assistant manager I work with most of the time has a brother who did an amazing deed. He had a good friend that needed a kidney. When he was tested and was discovered to be a perfect match, the young man donated his kidney to his friend. Is that amazing or what! I have to ask myself if I'd really do that should a friend of mine need one of mine. I would hope that I would.

Psalms 63:3, "BECAUSE YOUR lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise YOU."

On my way home from a very difficult and physically painful day at work, my car quit. I was about 8 miles from home so I knew I couldn't walk home. I don't have a cell phone and I really need to pray harder that God would provide so I could have one. I've tried those that you add minutes to, only to find a very limited area where they work, and of course.......it's never an area where I need. Anyway, I walked to a very nearby neighbor's house and was greeted so kindly. I was allowed to use their phone and I made the necessary call. I wanted to go back and stay with the car, but these dear people was so concerned. It was really cold. I appreciated their concern but I didn't want to leave the car unattended. Back to the car I went.

You have to understand I travel rather prepared. Extra clothes, flashlight, water, important things. I usually have a blanket in the car, but I'd neglected to put one in the car. I assure you, the blanket is headed there now. Usually when I send out a 911 call to my family, I am rescued rather quickly. I waited. Shortly, the neighbor whose phone I used drove down to make sure I was alright and tried to get me to go the their house and stay. I assured him that someone would be there shortly.

I sat another ten minutes and down came the neighbor again. He told me my husband had called back and said someone was on their way. That dear guy didn't want him and his family to go to the local basketball game until they were sure I had help coming! Was that a God thing or what! Because of the mess this world has gotten to be, so many are afraid to reach out and help. God made sure I had good help, right there when it was needed!

Time passed and no one came. Even though I wasn't on a main road, I was amazed at the traffic that flew past me. The longer I sat, the colder I got. I used my flashlight and read a little of the newspaper I had with me. I knew not to use car lights because it'd run the battery down and that would only make things worse. (I had the parking lights on so cars could see me. I did have sense enough to do that!) I sat there and yelled at myself several times for not having my blanket in the car. I grabbed some of the extra clothes I had and drapped them over me and they helped a little.

Then IT happened. Yep...........nature call! I needed a powder room so bad. I squirmed and wiggled and did everything I could think of to keep my mind off my "need" and off the cold. Obviously no one was coming too quickly for me this time. I lasted battling my "need" as long as I could. I grabbed my handy dandy flashlight, a handful of kleenexes and out of the car I went.

Of course, the car was off to the side of the road where there was nothing but open field. I had to cross the road, walk down a little ditch, and get to trees where I could at least have a bit of privacy.

There was a beautiful full moon out and I so appreciated the added flashlight that God provided. Everything went very well. Business taken care of. Bladder relief that cannot be explained. The first step I took to go back to the car my foot got tangled in a root in the ground and yep............down I went. I fell. I hit really hard and of course, I fell on my bad hip.

I was dazed and even dizzy and I remember I kept saying outloud, "Help me Jesus. Help me!" I was really having a time getting up because there was nothing handy to hold on to to pull myself up.

I am sure our awesome God has a real sense of humor. I can vision Him in heaven with Dad and the minute I fell I can hear Dad say, "God, she's done it again." Then I can hear God say, "Yep she did. Angels.........go get our rollie pollie daughter up and get her going again!" I'm telling you I'm sure a conversation similar to that took place. I am such a clumsy person........always have been. In years past as I learned and accepted who I really am IN CHRIST, I would rather explain to others that I am not just clumsy. I am a graceful person that falls down from time to time so God and His angels can pick me up.

I finally got up. I stood still a minute to get my bearings straight and back to the car I went. I was soooooooooooo thankful to get to my car. I hurt. I hurt in places I didn't know it was possible to hurt. I was cold. I kept saying outloud, "help me Jesus, help me."

After I had sat for an hour and half, finally........finally I was rescued. Seems there was a miscommunication from my "heros" and things got confused. (Excuse me, but isn't that just like men. We ladies would never do such a thing in an emergency.)

I was thrilled to see our oldest son. We were near a driveway and he gently pushed the car to the driveway to get me off the road. What a detail God worked out! My son knew the person living at the house so he knew the car would be okay and they'd not mind!

I couldn't wait to get where it was warm! As I crawled into the seat, I realized our little grandson had come with him. He's 2 and such a fun child to have around. He was tickled to see me and I thanked him for coming to rescue me. We chatted and talked as we headed down the road.

Little Gage had so much to tell me and I made sure I listened and responded. In between our conversations, our son and I chatted, too. I don't recall the details of what we were talking about but I remember I said, "Oh, good Lord!" Gage turned, looked at me and said very plain, "oh good Lord!" That was a God hug to me! The cuteness and smile on his face took a very difficult and trying day and turned it into a day that all the aggravation just didn't seem to matter. I was safe, warm, and laughter was being shared. God had been with me and never left me. He watched over me and worked everything out. I cannot praise Him enough!

Our son that came to my rescue was not our mechanical son. I want ya to know that the situation with the car was not major and the car is okay now. I have wheels and another fun experience with God under my belt. God and I sang together in the car. The sky and the moon was absolutely gorgeous! Had I not been sitting there waiting, I'd missed that beautiful moon and sky. I had QUIET in my life. God was so gracious He even had not one, but two very nice young men stop their cars and ask if I needed help! I bet there must have been thirty cars or more go down that road. I figure it was because of the basketball game in town. Of all the cars, TWO stopped to ask if I needed help! That was a God thing, too!

Today God gave me this, (Dea's version), "Dea shall have joy in Your strength, O Lord; and in Your salvation how greatly shall she rejoice......For You meet her with the blessings of goodness..........Be exalted, O Lord, in Your own strength! Dea will sing and praise Your power and strength." Psalm 21:1,3,13.

Remember the verse I shared earlier, "because Your lovingkindess is better than life, my lips will praise you." I have to wonder how many others amongst us would be able to keep on praising the Lord while experiencing such a situation as I did! Oh, I know. There are far worse situations in our lives and I even have to ask if we can manage to praise Him no matter our circumstances. I am reminded of Habakkuk 3:17-19, "Even tho.............no matter what happens or what circumstances I find myself in...............NO MATTER.........YET.........I will praise Him." (Dea's version)

It's Monday..............here I go again............ "the Lord is the strength of my life.........." Whatever is ahead of me, I know God is already there and together we'll get thru it..............till next time........get that Bible open and read, read, read..........hugs to all............oh, there's MORE to this experience that will simply amaze you.............be sure to check back in another day or two............

Answers to Prayer and Other Stuff

2008-01-17T19:13:00.000-08:00

I never realized how much others enjoy listening to my babblings until someone emailed me the other day and told me they hadn't seen anything new and was wondering if I was alright! Although I have a reputation of being a blabbermouth........sometimes I really don't have anything to say.The Scriptures have been so good to me lately. Often I have absorbed a verse and simply set back and thought, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! That sure felt good!" Ever had that experience? If not, you're missing out! As you open your Bible ask God to feed you. May I suggest a Psalms every day. If all you can manage is one verse, then read one verse. I'd also like to suggest you leave an OPEN BIBLE near you. If you have a desk.......that's a good place. If you spend a lot of time in your kitchen.........find a spot.........get that Bible open.

"I have trusted in Your mercy; my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation. I will SING to the Lord, because He has dealt bountifully with me." Psalms 13:5,6I don't know about anyone else, but I really NEED to trust in His mercy. I keep telling folks that if I haven't worn God out yet, then nobody will. I am so thankful for our longsuffering God!

I rejoice in many answers to prayer not only within my own four walls, but in answers to prayer for others. I was asked to pray for a little guy named Gus who was very sick. Gus is getting better every day. I was asked to pray for a pastor's wife with cancer. We are hearing nothing but good news about that situation! I have a writer friend that God has opened doors to go and speak and sing and she comes back from her ministry safe and sound rejoicing in Him and what HE has done thru her. God has been good and I give Him all praise.

Anyone besides me enjoy finding a REAL BARGAIN! When our boys were little had it not been for garage sales, they'd not had clothes. I still enjoy garage sales. I work retail and from time to time I get the job of standing in one spot for hours and doing nothing except repricing things to usually clearance prices! UGH! I hate standing in one spot, but it's a job that must be done. Last week I was doing clearance markdowns in our baby department and what a find I found! Can you believe I found umbrella strollers for $1.50?!!!!! I was so excited because I knew without a doubt God had allowed me to work in that area that day because He knew that blessing was there. I have a valuable friend that works in a ministry that can really use such a bargain. There was 8 of those little strollers and God provided so I could get them all to donate to my friend's ministry! Do we have an awesome God or what! I also found TWO bottles of baby shampoo for fifty four cents each and one very soft, fleece yellow blanket for a mere dollar. I am not always the one that do these markdowns. Don't even try to tell me that God didn't have a hand in having me do that job that day with THOSE blessings! I give Him all praise! Know what else? God has already given back to me the money I invested in His ministry. I invested around ten to twelve dollars. Yesterday, God provided a much needed one hundred dollars to us. I haven't even managed to get the merchandise to where it needs to go and God is already sending in the blessings from it. Wonder what He'd sent had I invested MORE!!!!!

It's the time of the year in retail when work hours are usually cut way back. I have a dear friend I work with that has major need. She is single and depends on her job to live. Her hours had been so few. I keep praying that God will give us increase in sales at work so EVERYONE can have the work hours THEY NEED. Lift a hand to heaven today because my friend got a lot more hours to work on the next schedule! That's God! That's God answering prayer and God taking care of NEED!

I hardly ever get to see our youngest son. He is the busiest guy I've ever seen. He keeps in touch by phone but for this mom, it's not the same as seeing him or spending time with him. I give God all praise because I have seen our youngest son 3 days in a row this week AND........I've had the pure pleasure of feeding him something home cooked! He's on the go and travels so much, he eats out a lot. I've got to fix him some things this week that I know he enjoys he'd never get out on the move. Getting those hugs from him means more to me than I could ever express!

We have MORE good news! We are gona have another little grandson come June. Our oldest is busting at the seams over the news he's having a boy. We'd all been just fine no matter. We pray for healthy babies in our family. I guess they've set their minds on naming him Brock Andrew. I am assuming it'll grow on me eventually! He's not our baby and they can certainly name him what they want. You know me.......I'd stick a Bible name in there some place. I guess if I have a concern at all it is that this little guy will be like his 2 year old brother! Talk about a busy baby! My goodness that 2 year old of ours is amazing! I'm too old to chase after one that stays that busy! No way I'd ever manage running after two of them......but boy won't I have fun trying!

With all the blessings come the challenges and the heartaches. Your continued prayer support for my sister, brothers, and I as we journey on with Mom is much appreciated. For those of you who don't know, we were told 4 years ago that Mom had six months to a year left. The doctor sent us home from the hospital with Hospice involved. I remember when the doctor told us that I looked him right in the eye and said, "You don't know our Mom and you don't know the God we know!" Hospice of course has since come uninvolved. We're out here in this ocean of challenge flopping around trying to always agree and trying to always do the right things with Mom and for Mom. Three of us are believers, one is not. It's not easy. The decision has been made to place Mom in a home where professional people can watch her and help her. If anyone thinks it was an easy decision...............take my word for it, it wasn't. Mom's mind is failing. Her body is broken and it's harder and harder for her to even get up and walk across the floor. So many things have fallen into place and opened up for us for Mom so quickly, we believe the timing of this is of God. Those of us who believe in the power of prayer have prayed for God's leading every step of the way with Mom. As much as I hate the thought of Mom not being with family all the time, I am soooooooo excited because Mom will be living ten minutes from me. All our lives Mom and I have always wanted to live close to each other. I've always been thirty minutes or farther away. Now, she'll be ten minutes from me and I'm so excited about that. We are thankful Mom will be under the watchful eye of professional people who are trained to handle her every situation. When you think of us.......please remember us in prayer. We hope within a few more days we'll have her settled. (Paperwork, paperwork, and more paperwork! UGH!!!!)

Til next time................"Keep me as the apple of Your eye; Hide me under the shadow of Your wings." Psalm 17:8 Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.............

New post, January 8, 2008....in service for Him

2008-01-08T18:04:00.000-08:00

How's it going in this wonderful New Year God has brought us into? I'm doing okay. I've only dumped something on our carpet TWICE already and I managed to break into pieces an angel my sister bought me for Christmas. I'm right on track..........not one thing I've done surprises anyone that knows me well. I'm the family "messy" and the family "breaker of anything."

For those of you who may be reading this and don't know this about me, here's a news flash.......I work retail. I love my job. I don't care much for the work conditions I have to work in, but I love what I do. Remember I am the blabberbox among us and I must share the experience I had this past Saturday.

I was paged to the jewelry counter for customer service. As I approached the counter I saw a frail gray haired man standing in front of the jewelry case with the sterling silver chains. I asked him if I could help him and he told me he needed a 24 inch chain. I grabbed the keys from the register and opened the sterling silver case. As I was checking for a 24 inch chain, the man took a small silver round thing out of a very small purple pouch. As we chatted he proceeded to tell me that his wife was being cremated that day and he planned to put some of her in the small silver round thing so he could have her with him everyday. The silver chain was needed to hang the silver round thing on. I was taken back a bit about the whole thing. I did offer him my sympathy on the passing of his wife. I asked if they'd been together long and he said 33 years. He cried. I felt so bad for him. We found just the right chain and I showed him how to put it on and hook it and get it unhooked. I assured him I'd say a prayer for him and his family and this dear man could not thank me enough. Only one of many opportunities I get to share in this world of retail I work in. More stories will come. I give God all praise for each opportunity.

One of my friends from work came down with that wonderful upper respiratory thing that is going around. I felt so bad for her. The cough and congestion sounds just awful. I won't see her probably until this coming Sunday, but we email a lot. What a wonderful feeling it gave me when I PRAYED FOR HER AND WITH HER thru the email. If you've never taken the time to do that.............give it a try. The peace that comes with it is amazing. My friend reports today she's doing much better.

Is this weather crazy or what! For me, it's another sign that Jesus return is not far off!

Are you having challenges? Do the days seem dark and dreary? Does it seem like when one thing gets off your plate another jumps right back on? May I please encourage you to praise your way thru!!! Habakkuk tells us in chapter 3:17-19 that even though his own situation was in the pits, no matter whether he had food or cattle or his fields were growing. No matter his circumstances, Habakkuk says, "YET I will REJOICE in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation." WOW! What a verse! Take the time to read all three of them and I pray your heart and soul will be encouraged and best. The Holy Spirit directed me to Habakkuk today and I sure needed reminded of the things God spoke to me there and the things I learned from those three little verses.

Til next time................keep praising, stay in the Word,..............and accept HIS gift of peace.........Dea

Getting to Know God Thru Dea

2008-01-01T02:26:00.000-08:00

"...the Lord is the strength of my life..." Psalms 27:1

The above verse says it all for me. Without Him, I am nothing. Without Him, I can do nothing. I continue to stand amazed in His presence that HE CHOSE ME to be His daughter.

I live in a small rural community. My husband, Bill and I have been married for 35 years. We have been blest with two sons, Gerry and Shad. Two daughters, Jill and Angie. Our grandchildren, Tara, Allyssa, McKenzie, Cody, Leana, Bryanna, Alexis, Justin, and Gage bring nothing but joy to our hearts. Our oldest son and his better half will be blessing us with another grandchild in June, 2008. Our oldest granddaughter, Tara, has blest us with TWO great grandchildren, Paityn and Maverick. Personally I think I'm too young to be a great grandma........but God has blest us and I am thankful for our family.

Bill is retired and I work part time in retail. My hobby besides my family is writing. I don't remember a time in my life that I haven't had a piece of paper and writing utensil to write with. I've always written but never did anything with anything I've written.

I hope you will visit my blog from time to time. I will be sharing my writings here. Older ones, old ones, and hopefully new ones. In 2003, after losing both my dad and brother within five months of each other, my fingers have been silent. The ache and hurt in my heart over their loss has been so great, I've really not had anything to say. It is my prayer that thru this blog, the pain will cease and God will begin to come thru on paper to others.

I truly believe that in anything I write there is a personal message from GOD TO YOU. It is my earnest prayer that in anything I write and you read, or anytime I am given opportunity to speak that God will become more real to you thru my writings and speaking. God and I have been thru a lot. We've laughed A LOT. We've hugged constantly. We've danced, we've cried, we've reached out. He's been my Stength, my High Tower, my Horn of Plenty, more times than I could ever be able to share. Wait til you hear about my garbage bag He gave me. Yep, God gave me a garbage bag. He cared so much for my need of a garbage bag that HE PERSONALLY made sure I had one. Then there's the stories about the wonder bread, and eckrich bologna, and unexpected money in the bank, and $6,000.00 coming in the mail so we could buy a house! Folks, I have much to share and I pray you will come back to this site often and SEE AND HEAR all the great things God has done and continues to do in my life.

I give Him all praise!!

Remember this always........if someone offered to GIVE you a car for free, you would take it. Not only has God given us the FREE gift of eternal life, but He's also GIVEN us another gift. His gift of PEACE......"My peace I leave with you.......My peace I give....." John 14:27. As a believer I know I need to accept His peace just as easy and simply as I would if someone gave me a new car or a new dress. It's so easy to say, so hard to do.

Til next time................Dea