Things they are a changin'...........

Seldom is change a pleasant thing. I'll be at the ripe old age of 57 come the end of October and personally, I do not like change. I like things settled. I like things organized. I like somewhat of a routine. When things must change, I don't know about you, but change is really difficult for me.

I found myself faced with a really tough decision. I had the opportunity to have a job 15 minutes from my house. No more driving 30 miles one way. No more slapping myself in the face to keep me awake getting to work on an early morning shift or a late night shift. No more having to get up two hour ahead to get dressed and make sure I had at least 45 minutes to an hour to get to work. Dad always taught me to never be late. He always taught me to plan for the unexpected. He always said if one was some place too early, that left time to talk to God, or write a letter, or just to rest a few minutes. With having to drive so far, I wanted to allow for the unexpected so I'd not show up late for work. If I changed jobs, I wouldn't have to get up and start two hours ahead of time.

Even with all the positive things about changing the job, it was still a very difficult decision for me to make. Why? I felt like I was abandoning ship. I felt like I was letting down my friends and family that I had at my job. I knew they needed help daily. I didn't want to leave any of them. I always tried to be positive. I always tried to encourage my family and friends there to laugh. Laughing a lot sure helped with what seemed like endless stress that came with the job. Who would laugh with them now?

Isn't it just like our God to allow obstacles thrown at us while we're trying to make a tough decision! During my decision making time, a coworker (a believer) came to me about a family crisis. This person came to me in confidence and asked me to pray. A few days later they came to me again so distraught over the crisis. I shared Bible with this person. I hugged this person. Who would do that if I left?

One of my dearest friends from work told me the week before I left, "I tell everyone you are my Kmart therapy. You're just the best therapist." I knew I was leaving by then.......and I nearly cried.

So many of my coworkers had become my family and friends. They had been a part of my life and my personal family life for nearly 5 years. Often they touched my heart in ways I cannot share. I did not want to leave. But........

God told me it was time. God told me He no longer needed me there and He told me to move on. There was a time in my life when God and I would have argued a long while over it. This time, we didn't. I knew in my mind and heart, God had opened the door and it was time for me to move on.

I suppose to some I took the chicken way out. It was never meant to be that way. I knew I had to give proper notice. I wanted to leave in good standing. When I told our personnel that I was leaving I asked that not one word be said to anyone. I didn't want anyone to know I was leaving. I knew I was doing what was best for Bill and I, for Mom, for my family, and for the first time in my life, for myself. I quietly went to work there, and I wanted to quietly leave.

There are two friends there that became like sisters to me. The laughter we shared, the fun we had, the tears we shared.........I had to tell them. When the weather was really bad or if the work schedule so heavy I couldn't drive home and shouldn't, they opened their home to me. The couch was mine and even now, it's still mine. It wasn't easy to tell them, but I did. I know they didn't really like it, but I also know I have left with their love, their support, and their door always open. I asked them also to keep quiet about my leaving and they respected my request.

Why the silence about my leaving? It was easier for me and if making it easier for me made me look like a chicken, then so be it. I've been thru a lot over the past several years. The stress and strain and loss in my life has mounted up pretty high. I continue to learn to do what I have to to deal with the stresses of life. For me to leave was easier by just going without any fuss, without any fanfare. I have no regrets.

Into my new work place I went with my head held high. I knew I still had my good friends and family. I knew that emails and snail mail and visits on occasion would see to that. But most important, I knew I was doing what God wanted of me at this time in my life.

I can't begin to find words to explain how great it is to drive 15 minutes and be at work. After a days work, 15 minutes and I'm home. I drive right past where Mom lives and when my schedule allows me, I can stop in anytime and visit with her all I want. If Mom has an emergency no one hast to wait for me to show up. My sister is five minutes from where I work. If I'm needed, they have easy and quick access to me. Do we have a God of detail or what!!!!

When I was hired I thought I was going to work with clothing, ect. After the second interview, I was asked if I'd consider taking a job as a cash register operator. I nearly went thru the roof with excitement and said, "Sure I would." I'm telling you God never ceases to amaze me!

My body is worn and battered. All that floor retail work has taken it's toll but I'd keep on doing it if that's what was asked of me. God has decided it's time for me to take it easy. I'm doing nothing except going in to work, visiting with lots of people, and running a cash register. I swear I feel like I'm on vacation every day! I actually have energy left after I get home! For years, that was unheard of. I'd crawl home and get a shower and get on a heating pad and wait for the body to allow me to lay down. I am meeting new people all the time. I am visiting with old friends I haven't seen in years. It's great!

God knows I am a bit talkative. (Okay, you guys that are saying back to yourself under your breath, "a bit" talkative......straighten up! Remember God knows what you think!) God has placed me into a wide open mission field and God knows I won't be silent. I have already had opportunity to share with several customers "God stuff!" It's great!

I enjoy going to work and I enjoy getting up to go to work! Absolutely amazing! It's been years since I've been able to say that! I give God all praise! This is God. This is a God thing and God taking care of me and working out details I never even thought about.

You will not believe what else! I am going to church! I have gone home! As long as I can afford gas in my car, I am attending Sunday morning services in the Baptist church I grew up in. The first time I went, I was priviledged to sit among the "roses" of the church. I saw three of my "former" youth leader young ladies sitting in a row with space for me. I was so blest to get to talk with them and share with them a few minutes before services. To be with them and "listen" to them still sing......what a major, major blessing! I stood my ground when I was hired. They asked on the employment application what times we are available each day of the week. When it came to Sunday, I told them I wasn't available until 2pm on Sunday afternoons. They respect that and have no problem with it. I have learned my lesson. I will not change my mind. I will not give in and do any favors for just one Sunday or whatever. I am not available for work until 2:00 in the afternoons on Sundays! Those of you who follow my babblings in this blog might recall I wrote about needing preached at. Praise the Lord! I am being preached at!

Life is hard. The burdens in my life remain. The heartaches are still here. But God has answered so much prayer about me a job, I can only continue in praise to Him.

"I sought the Lord and He heard me and delivered me.....This poor woman cried out, and the Lord heard her and saved her out of all her troubles....O taste and see that the Lord is good: Blessed is the woman who trusts in Him.....There is no want to those who respect Him." Psalms 34

I'm not perfect. Often I feel as if I should receive no blessings. Often I feel that God should not even listen to my prayers or take care of my needs. But, God remains faithful and I keep trying. He knows my heart!

Blessings to all.......read a Bible verse every day........and laugh a lot..........God will get us thru it.........no matter what "it" is! Hugs, Dea